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DIDGE - The View From Down Under

An Aussie’s ridgy-didge view of world affairs and popular culture.

Monday, February 27, 2006

The War on Australian Culture

Costello faces backlash over dual citizenship comments

The Treasurer Peter Costello set off a hue-and-cry today after a speech in which he said Australians with dual citizenship should be stripped of their Australian papers if they don't respect this country's values and laws. Mr Costello particularly singled out Muslims in his remarks, saying those who advocate extremism should move to countries where they feel more comfortable.

You know, I actually agree with Mr Costello. Australia is a democracy, and we shouldn’t let people in who are not going to live by our values. I respect your right to have an opinion and to express it, but that doesn’t give you the right to force that opinion on everyone else. So if you want gay marr- sorry, Sharia law, then get out of this democracy.

But I don’t think Mr Costello’s speech went far enough. I’ve heard that there are these Christian Extremists who don’t have sex until they are married! No sex at all until they’re hitched! I know it’s hard to believe, but they do exist. And really, if having a drunken bonk on the beach with some stranger on the Gold Coast isn’t Australian culture, then I don’t know what is. So I’m writing a letter to Peter Costello to urge him to deport all Christians who don’t have sex before marriage. I’m just really worried that their extremist attitudes will affect Australia’s liberal shagging values.

Then will we have to deport all Buddhists and vegetarians and vegans. The great Aussie barbeque, sizzling meat of all kinds, fried eggs and bacon for breakfast, and a late night kebab. These all say ‘Mate, that’s bloody Australian’ to me, and anyone against the consumption of meat or animal products needs to be deported right away. Oh, and get rid of all Hindus, too. They don’t eat hamburgers. Or, apparently, have sex on the beach with boozed-up floozies. We need to save our culture!

Friday, February 24, 2006

New ‘Bloody Hell’ advertising campaign

No, it’s not from the Iraqi Ministry of Tourism, it’s actually for Australia.

Jacket Flak

So I was surfing this morning and came across Channel Seven’s horrid morning show, Sunrise, and I saw this:
Um, does anyone know why Mark Beretta is wearing a jacket of the Yemeni flag?

On a somewhat related note, this is humorous.

Wednesday, February 22, 2006

Two ridiculous things:

Guantanamo actors held at airport
The actors who star in movie The Road to Guantanamo were questioned by police at Luton airport under anti-terrorism legislation, it has emerged.


On the subject of Michael Winterbottom, check this: The Road to Guantanamo, 9 Songs, Code 46, In This World, 24 Hour Party People, Welcome to Sarajevo. I love his diversity! This new film should be ace.

US 'reclassifying' public files
US intelligence agencies have been removing thousands of historical documents from public access, the New York Times has reported.

<>

Under existing guidelines, government documents are supposed to be declassified after 25 years unless there is a particular reason to keep them secret.

But some historians argued that the reclassification program is removing material that can do no conceivable harm to national security, the New York Times said.

Mr Aid mentioned among the "innocuous" files removed a 1948 memorandum on a CIA scheme to float balloons over countries behind the Iron Curtain to drop propaganda leaflets.

Saturday, February 18, 2006

Just so you don’t get it mixed up with the Armadillo Racing World Cup


An entirely non-partisan poll from our friends at Men’s Health Australia.

But a couple of quibbles in this completely un-Sydney-centric poll. Why refer to it as ‘Rugby League’ and not the NRL season, and ‘AFL’ instead of Australian Rules? And who determined the order of options? Why not alphabetically? And why is the Melbourne Commonwealth Games on the bottom? You could also be forgiven for pondering why they chose to use a photo of a rugby player to accompany their poll.

Oh well, who cares? The AFL season and the “Not The Armadillo Racing World Cup” are beating the ‘Rugby League season’. Does that include the Balmain under 9s?

Thursday, February 16, 2006

Never Before Broadcast Abu Ghraib photos

Click HERE for a selection of some of the photos. WARNING: VERY GRAPHIC PHOTOS.

Last night SBS screened photos and videos from the notorious Abu Ghraib prison in Iraq. Most of the photos and videos that were shown had never been published.

Needless to say, the photos are absolutely sickening. While watching the program I felt like crying. Can the conservative psychos, who went on and on about it being just a guy with underwear on his head, come to their senses now? There’s a photo of a corpse that looks like it’s missing a part of its head. Though I won’t get my hopes up. The original batch of photos had US soldiers smiling over the corpse of a man, never mind the photos where people were being punched, and it was always just a guy with panties on his head.

If there is one good thing to come out of this horrible mess, it’s my faith in SBS. While the Australian version of 60 Minutes is interviewing Tom Cruise and investigating another bizarre sex cult, Dateline is doing real journalism. This major story has spread all over the world, thanks to a little TV channel in Australia.

BBC News: New Abu Ghraib images broadcast
An Australian TV channel has broadcast previously unpublished images showing apparent US abuse of prisoners in Iraq's Abu Ghraib jail in 2003.

Guardian Unlimited: New 'Abu Ghraib abuse' images screened

MSNBC: New Abu Ghraib abuse images revealed

Reuters: New Abu Ghraib abuse photos broadcast in Australia

Wednesday, February 15, 2006

My latest crush on a TV character

Okay, so over the last week I’ve been watching that B-grade Marine action TV series, Pensacola: Wings of Gold. I think the actor who plays First Lieutenant Robert "Chaser" Griffin, Rod Rowland, is extremely cute.

Anyway, I was surfing the web for sites about him, and found quite a delicious bit of info: his favourite writer is Hunter S. Thompson. Now that’s some serious awesomeness! [Note, from this site: "His favorite author is "Hunter S. Thompson"????? I've never heard of this person, so I'm not sure I caught the name correctly."]

Not only is Rod super dreamy, he is also intelligent and, from all accounts, quite an actor, too. It’s just disappointing that he was only in season one of Pensacola.


Some cool Rod Rowland sites:

Exposed - A Rod Rowland Site

The Rodney Rowland Regular Work Site

The Offical Rod Rowland Site

Angelfire Fan Site - Rod Rowland Page

And speaking of the late Mr Thompson...

"Why are we seeing George Bush on TV every two hours for nine or ten days at a time, like some kind of mutated Mr. Rogers clone? Something is dangerously wrong in any country where a monumentally-failed backwoods politician can scare our national TV networks so totally that they will give him anything he wants."

"Who are these Swine? These flag-sucking half-wits who get fleeced and fooled by stupid little rich kids like George Bush? ..... They speak for all that is cruel and stupid and viscious in the American character.... I piss down the throats of these Nazis. And I am too old to worry about whether they like it or not. Fuck Them."

Tuesday, February 14, 2006

Bush Admin. Prison Bitch Names

Yes, it’s crude, but we all like a bit of gutter humour now and then, don’t we?

Via
Prison Bitch Name Generator.

George Walker Bush = Bung Boy
Dick Cheney = Fudge Sucker
Donald Rumsfeld = Mouth-Mangler
Karl Rove = Dirt Devil
Condi Rice = Count Suckula

And what about our friends at Fox News?

Bill O’Reilly = Cream of Meat
Sean Hannity = Bowel Boy
David Asman = Fuck Stick
John Gibson = The Recptacle
Brit Hume = Catcher's Mitt
Steve Doocy = Famous Anus

And finally your esteemed blog author? I would be know as: Skidmarks.

Honestly, I think I would have preferred Bowel Boy.

Monday, February 13, 2006

Worst. Puns. Ever.

CNN has contacted the Prophet Mohammed to ask him his opinion on the cartoon controversy. He said he wouldn't be drawn on the issue.

* * *

You know, these anti-Danish protests have been going on for days and days now. Yeah, they've been so drawn-out.

I Heart Mick Jagger and Harrison Ford

Super awesomeness: Finally, a celebrity being completely and refreshingly honest. As you would probably know, The Rolling Stones performed at last week’s NFL Super Bowl XL (I think XL stands for extra-large, being an American sport after all). Before they took to the stage a pre-recorded interview was shown. The interviewer asked Jagger if playing at the Super Bowl had been a long time dream for him, because you know, it’s watched by 70 billion people. Jagger replied: “Not really.” (Followed by laughter) What a gem! What joy!

Yes, the Super Bowl is a huge event in America, most likely the biggest annual sporting event there, but the rest of the world doesn’t give a damn about it. Please understand that just because something is popular in America doesn’t automatically mean that the rest of the world are fanatical supporters of the San Francisco Buccaneers or the New York Dolphins or whatever.

It is worth pointing out that the 2004 Super Bowl had a global TV audience of 93 million. It is also worth pointing out that of those 93 million people, 98% were watching from North America.

Harrison Ford also won my respect for his hilarious appearance on The Daily Show. I had never been fond of Mr. Ford, as he came across to me as being cold and distant and really quite apathetic. So it was a joy to see him in a completely different light. Go Harrison! You can watch the interview here.

Sunday, February 12, 2006

I really hate to nag, I know...

… but it’s pronounced NA-GA-NO. Please, Channel Seven, get it right. Anyway, the Torino Winter Olympics got underway last night. Here are my thoughts on the opening ceremony.

COOLEST THING THAT HAPPENED: 70s and 80s pop songs accompanying the arrival of the athletes. What is usually the most boring element of opening ceremonies actually turned out to be a groovy disco inferno. Freak out indeed!

COOLEST THING THAT DIDN’T HAPPEN: The Formula 1 car should have done donuts in the shape of the Olympic rings.

BEST TEAM OUTFIT: France.

WORST TEAM OUTFIT: Sweden. The Swedish fashion designers must have had some serious bullying at school from athletes, because their outfits were just plain cruel.

YAWN MOMENT: Waiting for the Italian team to walk around the stadium. By the time they sat down the speakers were playing music from the 90s.

HUH?! MOMENT: Yoko Ono’s speech. She was high, yes? I kept waiting for her to introduce the unicorn that was standing next to her. She reminded me of a certain cartoon character…

"I bring you peace."

ENDEARINGLY TWEE MOMENT: North and South Korea marching as one.

WHAT THE FUCK MOMENT: The women running all over the place with huge eggs on their heads. Seriously, not even David Lynch got that.

Friday, February 10, 2006

You are the one millionth visitor to this blog!!!

Thursday, February 09, 2006

Who needs education when you’ve ridiculous generalisations?

Most pupils see Muslims as terrorists
By Chee Chee Leung

February 6, 2006

MOST Victorian schoolchildren view Muslims as terrorists, and two out of five students agree that "Muslims are unclean".

Just over 50 per cent believe "Muslims behave strangely", and 45 per cent say Australians do not have "positive feelings about Muslims".

So that means about five per cent think behaving strangely is cool? Cool! But what isn’t cool is the Muslim = Terrorist line of thinking. But surely these school kids are what, two years old?

These are some of the preliminary findings from a statewide survey of student attitudes towards the Muslim community. The research — conducted in the second half of last year — is based on responses from 551 year 10 and 11 students across public and private schools.

Oh. My. God.

Wait, let me get this straight. The majority of 551 Year 10 and 11 students surveyed view Muslims as terrorists?! Um, okay. Have they actually ever met a person of Islamic faith? Do they know anything about Islam?

Almost half said they had learned "a little" about Muslims and Islam at school, but more than a third said they had learned nothing on these subjects.

Oh, you don’t say! I wonder how they could come to the conclusion that all Muslims are members of Killers International™ when they only know a little or nothing about them. I know! I have this really crazy idea, but why don’t they actually learn something about Muslims and Islam, then maybe they wouldn’t generalise over a billion people.

When asked if schools should teach more about Muslims, 29 per cent said no and 34 per cent said they did not care.

You know, I think I might see the problem here.

62 per cent agreed Christians were smart, while 36 per cent agreed Muslims were smart.

It’s the Koran that has the talking snake, right? ;)

38 per cent agreed or strongly agreed Muslims were the most negatively stereotyped of all minorities, including Aborigines.

Negative stereotyping?! No! It’s a scientific fact that all Muslims are terrorists. And they stink. Just like it’s a scientific fact that all gay people have sex 24 hours a day, blondes have more fun and all computers will come alive and kill everybody in the year 2036.

Islamic Council of Victoria board member Waleed Aly said the results were troubling.

"What it demonstrates is that Muslims are being viewed in a way that is really subhuman," he said. "The only way you can combat this kind of prejudice is on a personal level … it's much harder to hate people when you actually know someone in that social group."

I couldn’t have said it better. Cheers Waleed! If only we could clone people like Waleed and have them teaching in Victorian classrooms. Let’s just hope that these 551 students were a rogue bunch and don’t reflect the view of the majority of Australian teenagers.

Thursday, February 02, 2006

This is why America is the freest nation of Earth

Reuters: U.S. Capitol police arrest activist Sheehan

Cindy has written an excellent response to her arrest at
Daily Kos.

This is heartbreaking:

After I had my personal items inventoried and my fingers printed, a nice Sgt. came in and looked at my shirt and said, "2245, huh? I just got back from there."

I told him that my son died there. That's when the enormity of my loss hit me. I have lost my son. I have lost my First Amendment rights. I have lost the country that I love. Where did America go? I started crying in pain.

Wednesday, February 01, 2006

Fox News: Fair? Balanced? Stupid!

More brilliant reporting on Fox News Channel this morning. On their third-rate morning program, Fox and Friends, the presenters talked about American troops who are angry that an American reporter, who was injured in Iraq, is getting much more coverage on the news than American troops hurt or killed in Iraq. Why isn’t the American media reporting the deaths of those brave American soldiers? Why do they hate the troops so much?

Um… Okay… But, you know, when the liberal elitist media reports on dead American soldiers they’re branded un-American traitors who are giving support to the “terrorists”.

*Sigh*

Because he knows all about addiction…

On the issue of oil President Bush said the US faces a serious problem “America is addicted to oil, which is often imported from unstable parts of the world," like the Middle East.

It's like you're a drug, It's like you're a demon I can't face down, It's like I'm stuck, It's like I'm running from you all the time, And I know I let you have all the power, It's like the only company I seek is misery all around, It's like you're a leech, Sucking the life from me, It's like I can't breathe, Without you inside of me, And I know I let you have all the power, And I realize I'm never gonna quit you over time.