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DIDGE - The View From Down Under

An Aussie’s ridgy-didge view of world affairs and popular culture.

Monday, November 14, 2005

Thank You America, F**k you world

Via Sadly, No! comes this: Thank You, America. It’s supposedly a patriotic song, but sounds more idiotic than patriotic. Let’s forget for one moment about the horrendous vocals and just focus on the lyrics.

The opening thanks America for defeating the Third Reich and thus Americans don’t speak German. Now, when they thank “America” for this I’m not too sure if they are thanking the actual landmass or if “America” is a substitute for “troops serving in the US Army during World War II. But, “America” is less of a mouthful.

Maybe my memory is playing tricks on me, but I’m sure that some other countries might have participated in War World II. Hmmm…

Australia was among the first countries to declare war on Germany, on September 3, 1939. More than one million Australians, both men and women served in the war.

Canada declared war on Germany within days of the invasion of Poland (on September 10th 1939). They played an important role in several British-led campaigns, especially in Northwest Europe. Canadian forces contributed heavily in the air raids against Germany, the Battles of Britain, the Atlantic, Italy, and Normandy.

The UK was one of the original Allies, entering the war in 1939 to honour its guarantees to Poland. After the Fall of France the United Kingdom was the only allied nation left in Europe until the invasion of Greece. It remained the only one of the Big Three in the war until 1941 when the Soviet Union was invaded.

However, America joined the Allies in December, 1941, after being bombed by the Japanese. Maybe the lyric needs to be changed...

Well if it wasn’t for Pearl Harbour,
We’d be speaking German under the Third Reich,
Hey… Thank You Japan


Oh, and if the Third Reich had taken over the world, I don’t think speaking German would have been the worst problem.

Anyway, on we go...

The next bit says they are thankful that they don't speak Russian. They don't like more than one language in America! (Perhaps that is one of the reasons why they hate Canada so much. Bien sûr!).

Then the guy sings that he doesn't have to live under "that red flag." Now, I know that this is not the "red flag" that they mean, but take a look at this:
Yes, if you take out all the non-red bits from both flags the US one has more red in it than the Russian flag. Is it a communist conspiracy? Je ne crois pas.

Then the guy sings that he is thankful that his wife doesn't have to hide her face (under piles on make-up?) (because of a botched plastic surgery operation?) and that she can live like a woman. 'Cause you know, in Finland all females at the age of sixteen have to have sex change operations.

Then comes what is probably the stupidest line:

"If today I can drink a beer and celebrate life with no fear..."

Because nothing says Americana more than drinking a good beer with some good friends and enjoying good old freedom without none of that fea.... HOLY FUCK, THE TERROR ALERT COLOUR THING JUST WENT UP TO ORANGE. ORANGE, MAN!!! QUICK, GET THE DUCT TAPE AND SEAL UP ALL THE FUCKING WINDOWS.

Ahem.

Then he's happy that he can choose his own god. (Granted that it's the one and only God that will make all those godless faggots burn in hell. God bless you!)

Then he is happy he can say what he thinks without looking behind his back...

... unless of course you're Joseph Wilson. Boo-Yeah!!!

Then he just babbles on about being a free man in a free country.

So, what does this song tell us about America?

- They don't speak German
- They don't speak Russian
- They aren't a communist country
- They are not ruled by the Third Reich
- They are a secular country
- They can consume alcohol
- They are democratic

Well, that's summed up a lot of freaking countries.

Look, I have no problem with people writing songs about their love of America. And there are many, many wonderful things America has given the world. The problem is when they carry on like America is the only democracy in the entire world. It shows a complete and utter ignorance of the world and only strengthens anti-American sentiment. The next time someone writes a love song about America, please, please, write about what is UNIQUE to America. No, we don’t want to hear about how free you are. Or the fact that you don’t speak Mandarin. Or that you can drink fucking alcohol without feeeeaaarrrrr.

2 Comments:

At 3:31 AM, Blogger Carol said...

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